There are many different ways to handle conflict situations like the one we were placed in last Monday. Listed below are 5 ways people handle conflict:
Compete to win
Assertiveness to get one’s own way.
Avoidance
Withdrawal; used when there’s “no chance of winning.”
Compromise
Used with decision making under pressure; all members are equal.
Accommodation
Seeing issue as more important to others than self.
Collaborating
Requires bargaining and negotiation among group.
Multiple group insights required.
Thinking back truthfully, I feel that the way I handled it was Avoidance. It was frustrating when I wanted to let my opinion be known because there were so many other opinions being shouted out by everyone at the same time that I felt like I would be wasting my breath. I felt my own voice would just add more noise and not do anything to further our progress.
When our classmate tried to leave and our professor urged him to stay, he said he wanted to leave because he felt this whole thing was pointless and we weren getting anywhere. In that moment he voiced the exact frustration I was feeling up to that point: there were so many people in the class who were being totally unreasonable with their demands and others who were shouting down classmates who 'dared' to disagree and the whole thing seemed like it was going nowhere. When the professor told him he should stay, a classmate and I suddenly had an "A-ha!" moment and figured out that this was a decision-making exercise and the whole situation was set up to test how we go about handling the conflict.
Thankfully we were led very ably by the two students who got up in front of the class to lead the discussions and we got the job done. There were many students shouting that someone else should go up to the whiteboard to take over and urging each other to go up to the front but luckily the guys who were up there were able to keep the group on the right track and prevent chaos from taking over.
In the future, I would choose to use collaboration to come up with the answer. I would maybe break the room up into smaller groups to come up with suggested solutions and then put them up on the board and eliminate the ones that won't work while working to improve the ones we think will work. I would also choose leaders similar to the ones we had who are strong and fair and work not by telling people what to do but by reminding them of the task and keeping them organized and on the right track.
I agree, I think collaborating would be the best approach. If we broke the class into 6-7 small groups, the decisions on voting would have came out better, and we would have saved a lot of time.
ReplyDeleteWell, Mike your the third person I'm replying to and the third person to say they chose avoidance. As well, I did also. I found it to frustrating and overwhelming at times. I totally agree with breaking down the group into smaller groups. I too at one point realized that there was more to this then the professor allowing us to change the rules. I observed the professor taking the backseat and thought that it was a little strange. I realized he was leading by example in a indirect way. I think it was a creative way of engaging students. I also felt that some of the requests were a little ridiculous and some of the students were competing to win. I think that the two guys who took the moderator role did a good job. They stayed neutral and were respected for it.
ReplyDeleteI think me and you both dealt with the same problems with this decision; it definitely was stressful. Maybe the group thing would have work better, but I think there would have been conflict between groups. Honestly we did an amazing job and came out with a good decision.
ReplyDeleteI am surprised you chose avoidance. I had a different opinion of you. I am not judging you or anything, don't take me wrong. I don't think I understood how frustrated it was. I didn't get a good grade on the test and yes I wanted a good deal to improve the overall score. Maybe I just don't quite accept or understand what frustration really is. It was annoying to hear silly ideas from people, but I also thought it was funny at the end. Maybe because other classmates will throw that silly idea with a better one or so. I don't know. I was one of the people disagreeing. But I can honestly say that the conclusion was not exactly what I had in mind. Not better nor worse.
ReplyDeletei also agree the idea that we should break our class into small teams. Since not every one is comfortable to speak up in a large classroom,With a smaller team, everyone at least have some chance to express their idea and thought. Beside, the conflict level will also be decrease because we only have to deal with 3 or 4 people. after this class excise, i think next time we will do a better job.
ReplyDeleteBig Mike! I'm very surprised to hear that you and a classmate were able to figure out it was an exercise. I guess I was a little short sighted and preoccupied with what the professor left us with as a task. But then again it is professor Kurpis and I should have guessed other wise. I was saddened to hear that your original take was avoidance, but was glad that you spoke up later on. As for your idea to collaborate for future decisions and break up in groups, I think that may be more productive than a room full of screaming people. That scene in class shows us how real world issues are resolved by people who need lessons in management. Take for example when you see people in our government yelling at each other to be heard or in extreme cases look at some foreign government officials who actually fist fight to be heard. What a shame.
ReplyDeletewho wouldve known that a class full of people who seem to have a similar purpose (get a better grade) would clash in ideas and completely disagree with one another?!! honestly, i thought just making the next exam all multiple choice (not multiple multiple chice) wouldve been the way to go, considering most professors choose such a route. man, was i WRONG! this is perceptible evedince that we all are, indeed, different people and, as a result, desire different wants. in truth, opinions do vary, but at the end of the day, after all the yelling, screaming and irrational demands, as a class, we reached a bargain which i believe, benefits almost everyone.
ReplyDeleteI chose the same way of handling this as you did through avoidance. Because the way the class was going, people shouting out ideas and talking over one another. I got no chance of expressing my own ideas and some of what I wanted individually we exoressed by others so I sort of just sat back and let those who competes to win make all the talking. I mean at the end we still ended up compromising with the class and making a bargain witht he professor. The result was pretty satisfying.
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the avoidance club,
ReplyDeleteI too felt hostile with all the yelling. It was not an easy task nor was it controlled well. I could have spoke up but chose to listen. I can't blame you!
Yes, it was very easy to get frustrated in this situation with all the chaos, but happy that eventually our leaders got us to a conclusion.
ReplyDeleteThe idea of breaking into small groups could have worked, but think we would have had to have done that immediately since we were on the time constraint. Good idea if we are ever faced with a mission like this again.
Good luck on next exam!
I agree Mike that the leaders were very effective and their skills were very influential in bringing the class towards a resolution.
ReplyDeleteI also like your idea that maybe it wouldve been helpful if we had broken up into groups in the beginning. It might have helped control the chaos right from the start